That’s яight, Bob’s eyes aяe f-ed up, just like mine,
the infection is tяending on Twitteя and Vine.
The Olympic anchoя desk went up in flames,
when Bob could no longeя host the Sochi Games.
What was the cause? Foul TV make-up oя яouge?
Or peяhaps he ate sh*t while attempting the luge?
Maybe the boяscht fяom the night befoяe,
had been hoяяifically bяewing since the Cold Waя.
Whateveя the cause, I wish him well,
a quick яecoveяy foя the eyes fяom hell.
Oh, and I almost foяgot, hoping his ‘hotel’ room has light bulbs, nyet poison wateя, a fяamed Putin poяtяait, a toilet that allows fishing, a cuяtain яod, a яoof, nyet stяay dogs, faucet knobs, glass in the window fяame, a mattяess, electяicity, a showeя dяain, a dooя that unlocks fяom the inside, and a television to stay cuяяent on the cuяling competition in the 22nd Olympic Winteя Games.
————————————————————————————————————————————————-
Whenever I hear the word, ‘cataracts,’ I visualize a mountain range somewhere between the Catskills and the Adirondacks, thus, the Cataracts.
———————————————————————————————————————————————————————–
UPDATE:
Dr. F referred me to the most fab eye doc EVER. I’m telling you ~ he’s redic. Dr I, aka, Dr. Incredible, met with me and my mom last week, and we LOVED him, and not just because he’s a Trojan 🙂 He heads up Doheny Eye Institute, so it’s safe to say he has minute amounts of spare time, but you’d never know it. He gave me an extremely thorough exam, with all sorts of machines and gadgets I’d never seen before. He ended by checking out my cataracts, which he exclaimed were “beautiful”! I melted. He even invited Mom to sit in his chair, then gave her a lesson on looking through his magic viewer to gaze upon my gorgeous cataracts. She reported that mine were the most lovely of all the cataracts she’s seen. Because of my complications (previous LASIK surgery and Graft vs. Host of the eyes), Dr. Incredible wants to send me to the most qualified cataract surgeon he knows, so I am going to meet with Dr. K in a couple of weeks to discuss my upcoming lens implants.
Last Thursday, Dr. Fantastic looked at my results from AFBT (Another F-ing Blood Test) and liked what he saw. He has decided to lower my Tacrolimus once again! It’s reaching the point where I can almost take all my morning meds down in one gulp 🙂 That’s been one sick advantage of taking massive meds for so long, I can swallow fistfuls of pills. Sorry to brag, but it’s true.
So, the word of the day is: TAPER
I want to send a shoutout to my friend of 45 years, Laura, who has been posting words of encouragement on my Facebook for the past year! Like me, many of you have been inspired by her fantastic posts. Huge thanks, L!
Another dear friend, Mary, gave me a wonderful gift of private yoga sessions, and I finally felt up for the first one last week. I was a little intimidated, since my bod has been through a war and I have not stretched in almost 2 years. Leslie, the instructor was fantastic, as she had me take baby steps to start. Nearing the end of the session, she had me try chaturanga – nailed it!
JOSELYN'S BRAWL 
You are awesome! I think about you more than you know. Hope the new doc’s think the surgeries will be smooth sailing. Lunch soon??
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Thanks, Cinda – I’d love to go to lunch with you 🙂
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Poor T-Rex. No wonder Yoga is not for him. Glad you enjoyed your yoga class more than he.
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Yes, Peggy, yoga was awesome for me… Not so much for TR 🙂
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“felt up” ha ha : )
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Ha! XO
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Lol t-Rex doing downdog….too funny. Thanks for the humor!!!!
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Thanks, Vino! XO
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You looked so fantastic when I saw you last week, its hard to believe all
you’ve been through and are going through. You are one amazing gal.
Keep up your good work.
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It was great to see you, Barbara! Thanks so much for your kind words. Please send all my best to Stacy!
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Love the graphics! I will never hear cataracts again without thinking of the “adjacent” mountain ranges. One question about the toilet picture…what is the dude in the bottom right doing?
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Hey Jill – I was wondering the same thing… Some of the guesses I saw in a Twitter feed: 1. No injecting yourself with something 2. No throwing a grenade in the toilet then slipping in a pee puddle in the process 3. No drunk karaoke 4. Don’t draw red x’s on the bathroom wall 5. No graffiti writing 6. No injecting yourself with heroin or anything to treat the extra leg coming out of your backside 7. No injecting whilst giving birth
And then the fishing one… 1. No fishing for the syringe you used while breaking the rule in the bottom right 2. I don’t often use the toilet, but when I do, it’s for fishing 3. Well, when you gotta fish, you gotta fish!
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Yep, def looks a little bit like giving birth…to a pill bottle or a hot water bottle!
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Thanks Jos….You remind me about life on life’s terms and that shit sucks sometimes and there just isnt’ a hell of a lot to do except keep working at it Suz, move forward and stay as positive as you can!. AFter a few choice words…of course. Namaste. I keep you in my thoughts throughout my days, reminding myself…what would Jos do right now?
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Thanks so much, Suzanne, for thinking of me! I hope all is well 🙂
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Jos, You did nail that chatarunga. I’m so glad I was there to witness it. One tough chick!!!
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO
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Your generous gift is so terrific, Mary! It feels so amazing to move again! XO
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Continuing to inspire!
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Thanks for continuing to support, Laura! TTF
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Nice! the yoga is probably great! the eyes will improve too!
xoxoxo
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Kathleen, thanks for being there every step of the way! Love, Jos
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hey joselyn. happy to hear your meds have been cut back and that you are soon going to have the eye sitch under control. and yoga! wow.
thanks for the update…continue to keep you in our thots!
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Hi Jos, we’re sorry to hear you are still in Bob Costas mode, but it is wonderful you have such good and caring docs. We hope this is the last step in the long process and you will soon see clearly way beyond the Adirondacks. Glad to hear about the med reduction – that means just a little dab will do ya, rather than a handful. Through all this it is good to see you going to yoga and starting to work the bod again. We know you love exercise and have been starved with all the other stuff on your plate. We think of you all the time and tell people about the toughest and most beautiful chick we know. Keep that incredible attitude and continue to radiate your inner beauty to the world – it needs all the help it can get. Love, Lynn and Carolee
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Dear Uncle Lynn and Auntie Carolee – Your comments are always SO thoughtful! Thanks for taking the time to share your support so beautifully! Love you guys! Jos XO
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Caron – Thanks so much for the steady stream of support! You and the fam absolutely rock! XO
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Hahahahahaha!
You are incredible Joselyn! I think your eye surgery should come with an award for comedy writing.
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Robin – I think you deserve an award for thoughtfulness 🙂 Thanks ~ Love you!
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Jos,
Awesome post as always! Great news that your blood counts are better! We will praying for your meeting with Dr. K, too. We are also so excited about your yoga classes. That is going to be so great for you and something fun to look forward, too. Love you and are praying for you always!
Gretchen
Gretchen Miller
Transtar Commercial Real Estate Services
DRE# 01071427
http://www.transtar.com
949-760-4013 work
949-813-6122 cell
888-717-2563 fax
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Gretch! Thanks for your continued support! Love all the Millers! XO
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I am stoked that your meds are dropping even though it will reduce the need to practice the newly aquired skill of choking down the equivalent of horse pills. Good luck with the pesty cataracts.
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Thanks, Scott – I know, just as I was nailing my pill downage, Dr. F reduces my meds!
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Joselyn, Always so hilarious reading your adventures (though I’m sure you would rather have the traveling kind).
Keep getting better.
Michael Cargile | Senior Vice President
Voit Real Estate Services
2020 Main Street, Suite 100 | Irvine, CA 92614
T (949) 263-5338 | F (949) 261-9092
mcargile@voitco.com | http://www.voitco.com
License #00491668
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You are amazing, Mike! I greatly appreciate your support. Yes, can’t wait for the traveling kind of adventures!
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Jos glad the Meds are lessening and I have a whole new appreciation for cataracts and Bob Costas! Looks like downward facing dog will be in your future too yea. Miss you xx sue
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Hi Sue – I downward dogged this morning 🙂 Thanks and miss you, too! XO
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Your eyes are looking much better. Bob’s still suck, but yours are Fab! I can look at you, but NOT Bob! ENFU!
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I agree ~ Bob’s eyes still look like he crashed on the luge. ENFU ILD FTFO
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Hi Jos, your posts always amaze me with their creativity and positive energy! Sorry you have to have cataract(s?) surgery, but on the upside, at least it won’t be the t~ rex doing the procedure (heard they hate operating, too!). We think of you daily and feel blessed to know you and your amazing family. You will always be a comrade to the Hollas 🙂
xoxo
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Patty! You and all the Hollas rock my world! Thanks for the kind thoughts 🙂 Ya, T-Rex is booked way in advance, so I’m just going to go with Dr. K 🙂 XO
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Hi Jos. Hilarious as usual. I was wondering if you had your surgery yet. Hope it all goes well. I’m sure it will be nice to see clearly again! Keep us posted
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Cin. Hop. ~ Thanks for the support! I can’t wait to be able to see clearly, but then again, that means I’ll have a better look at my fugly, Charlie White hair 🙂 XO
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