Inspiration

Yo!  Sorry for the delay since my last post.  I’ve been out and about living a “normal” life 🙂 Birthday parties, fundraisers, weddings, dinners, lunches, moving children into apartments, movies, family reunions, etc.  So grateful that I’m able to do all of it!  As I celebrate Day 250 Post-Transplant, I’ve been reflecting on the past year and a half, and it seems like a blur, like it was someone else who went through all that sh*t.  Because of all my super supporters, I have absolutely rolled through all the poking, prodding, transfusing, transplanting, extracting, testing, injecting, barfing, balding, masking, gloving, shaking, scarring, numbing, infecting, medicating, etc.  I have been so very inspired by all of you.  Here are some of my fave inspirations you have sent my way:

“Fight On!” – Kathy F., Susie B., Debi P., Tracy M., Mychaela M., Luke M., Tom and Rennette C., Shane G., Cynthia C., Linda B.

“Hope believes anything is possible.” – Maggie and Jon P.

“I wish you joy with all my heart.” (By Jane Austen)  Amended with “and I wish you no more Shulman’s Syndrome with all my ass!” – Erin OB M.

“Live like you’re a rock star.” – Kara S.

“This too shall pass.” – Patti and Julie I. and Pam P.

“The sign of wisdom is a continual cheerfulness.” (French proverb) – Mary M.

“Walk among Nature’s glory and celebrate the color of Life.” – Emilie and Bob B.

“May the sun shine all day long, everything go right and nothing wrong.  May those you love bring love back to you, and may all the wishes you wish come true.” (Irish blessing) – Hilde G.

“I hope Dad’s transplant works good.”  Leason P. (the 5th)

“You are loved with His everlasting love and are in His everlasting arms!” (Jeremiah 31:3  Deuteronomy 33:27) – ElizaBeth C.

“Tomorrow will take care of itself.” – Celia H.

“Hope is the thing with feathers, That perches in the soul, And sings the tune without the words, And never stops at all.”  (Emily Dickinson) – Caron and Dana K.

“Keep warm, drink plenty of fluids, and don’t forget to accessorize.” – Asa and Pat H.

“A lion beats in every human heart – yours is now roaring!” – Lynn and Carolee P.

“May God bless you and keep the wind at your back on this journey!” – Alison and Bob D.

“Have only one rule:  Be your wild, courageous, brilliant self every single day.  No matter what.” – Erin OB M.

“Love light and prayers surround you.” – Cheryl and Roger S.

“Go Pokey, Go!” – Leason P. (the 3rd) (Dad)

“The age of miracles is forever here.” – Terri and Blake Q.

“I tell you we are here on earth to fart around, and don’t let anybody tell you different.” (Kurt Vonnegut) – Mary M.

“Hope holds up the head.” (Scottish proverb) – Maggie P.

“The force of the waves is in their perseverance.” (Gila Guri) – Patti, Pete and Julie I.

“Look for the small miracles happening around you everyday.” – Cathy K.

“One small positive thought can change your whole day.” – Laura T.

“Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you.” (Jeremiah 1:5) – Marlene P. (Mom)

“Friendship is one of the sweetest joys in life.” (C.H. Spurgeon) – Sue and Greg B.

“We take on the strength of that which we overcome.” – Marlene P. (Mom)

“Let your faith be bigger than your fears.” – Jeri and Danny M.

“We are all in your corner as you fight.” – Scott, Esme, Haley and Alana E.

“Positive positive thoughts.” – Kathleen M.

“I’ve got one bad ass momma!  She’s taught me that attitude truly is everything.” – Mychaela M.

“Health and healing.” – Jae M.

“Do not go where the path may lead.  Go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.” (Ralph Waldo Emerson) – Todd M. (Hubby)

“Keep on keepin’ on.” – Stephanie P.

“Never never never give up.” (Winston Churchill) – Mary M.

“Stay strong.  This sh*t can’t touch you.” – Rex M.

“The most wasted of all days is that during which you have not laughed.” (Nicolas De Chamfort) – Todd M. (Hubby)

“Soar high!” – Andie P.

“May you always have courage to take a chance, and may you never find frogs in your underpants.” – Alison D.

“Hang in there.  Sometimes the prettiest flowers grow in the biggest pile of shit.” – Amina, Tarek, Ahmed and Khaled M.

“Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass.  It’s about learning how to dance in the rain.” (Vivian Greene) – Courtney K.

“A bad day is all about perspective.” – Todd M. (Hubby)

“Laughter is the best medicine, unless you have diarrhea.” – Erin OB M.

“When you get into a tight place and it seems that you can’t go on, hold on – for that’s just the place and time that the tide will turn.” (Harriet Beecher Stowe) – Marlene P. (Mom)

“The one who falls and gets up is so much stronger than the one who never fell.” – Laura T.

“Whatever doesn’t kill me…. had better start running.” – Mary M.

“FTFO” (Fight the F On) – Alyssa P., Todd M. (Hubby)

“She worked many hours in order to graduate from FIDM while staying up-to-date on relevant sports statistics… She once rode an ostrich just to see how it rides…She climbs exotic mountains just to get her heart rate up.  She is… the best mom in the world!” – Rex M.

“When you’re going through hell, keep going.” (Winston Churchill) – Julie H.

“Anamatatizacotcommapaniake!” (Swahili saying – can’t translate, even on this foul mouthed blog) – Guy K.

“God gives us only what we can handle.  Apparently God thinks I’m a bad-ass.” – Monica F.

“What a wonderful spring this will be – a true rebirth.” – Susie, Steve and Stefanie B.

“Walking the beach and writing your name in the sand by the water so the waves can dance around and send you those strong healing vibes!” – Rose R.

“If you can conquer Kili, you can conquer anything.” – Lauren B.

“Tis the business of little minds to shrink, but they whose heart is firm, and whose conscience approves their conduct, will pursue their principle unto death.” (Leonardo da Vinci) – Laura T.

“Hair today?  Gone to marrow.”  Susie B.

“We are in it together and we are in it to WIN it!” – Todd M. (Hubby)

“Big time happy thoughts to you for much success.  How’s your burger?” – Guy K.

“Today you set foot on your new path to recovery.”  Marjorie S.

I also went through some of my photos and videos from the earlier days of my brawl, and I have to say, my chemo brain has done a great job of fuzzying up my memory of a lot of the worst parts.  (CBIART – Chemo Brain Is A Real Thing.  It’s widely recognized by the medical community and usually lasts about 4 years after chemotherapy.  Fan f-ing tastic!  Another delightful side effect 🙂 I’m apologizing in advance for forgetting your name, forgetting an appointment, not being able to carry on a conversation with multiple syllabled words, and lots of other stuff that I can’t remember right now.)

I’m also apologizing in advance of spitting on you while having a conversation using only single syllabled words.  My mouth moves a little funny now, with all the sores and scars from Graft vs. Host Disease, and I’ve given several friends and strangers saliva showers.  Sorry!

I recently had ONE glass of cabernet at a party – I’ve had very few adult beverages in the past year – and I woke up feeling like I had a pissed off honey badger with a thorn in his butt trapped in my head.  I’m such a f-ing lightweight.  Embarrassing.  A mere shadow of my former self.  Well, actually, I AM a mere shadow of my former self, being that I am 99.75% my bone marrow donating life-saving hero little bro now, so that should explain why I can’t drink like before, but considering Leason’s skills in that area, it explains nothing.

Remember me telling you about my eyelashes that were growing backwards INTO my eyeballs?  Well, it’s happening again.  I have 2 little f-ers that are twin lashes, each growing in the exact same location of each eye.  Lots of blinking.  Lots of tearing.  Lots of annoying.

My numb feet are also annoying, but now they are also cramping quite often, which hurts like a mofo.  I’ll be out in public somewhere and suddenly I’ll grab a foot, utter a 4 letter word (usually with spittle), and look around to find people staring.  What ev.

My donor life-saving hero little bro, Leason 4, who had just come to my room from his bone marrow harvest recovery to be there for the transplant.
Looking back:  My donor life-saving hero little bro, Leason 4, who had just come to my room from his bone marrow harvest recovery to be there for the transplant.
Todd and Mike (husband of my neighbor at COH, who had her transplant 4 days after me) comparing calendars where they both write the day post transplant.
Todd and Mike (husband of my neighbor at COH, who had her transplant 4 days after me) comparing calendars where they both write the day post transplant.
One of the trees outside the City of Hope entrance that has handwritten wishes tied to the branches.
Day 250.
Day 250.
Getting out with Mychaela and Mom – The Magic Kingdom.
I told Dr. F that I had a new and scary symptom – my toenails were different colors. He looked very concerned and said it was serious.
Getting out with Todd… I am NOT double fisting… one of those was lemonade, I swear.
My dear friend, Mary M., an expert ceramicist, made these beauties that match Todd’s tat!
Super appetizing lunch at COH: soup, English muffin and a bag of blood. Yummy!
Looking back:  Super appetizing lunch at COH: soup, English muffin and a bag of blood. Yummy!
Mychaela knit me a beanie during her visits to my bubble!
Looking back:  Mychaela knit me a beanie during her visits to my bubble!
Getting out with Leason 4 and my parents for lunch.
Getting out with Leason 4 and my parents for lunch.
Miss MedAmerica cast reunion.

Posted by

I am a survivor of two extremely rare diseases, thanks to over 100 blood transfusions and ultimately, a bone marrow transplant. My blog, joselynsbrawl.com, chronicles my adventures through medical offices, operating rooms, clinics, transfusion centers, hospital transplant floors, victory celebrations, and finally my bucket list items – all with a humorous and sometimes profane twist. My goal is to inspire others not to give up on life or anything else, and to understand that it’s actually possible to enjoy any experience, even battling a life-threatening illness (or two).

30 thoughts on “Inspiration

  1. So happy to hear your path is heading in the right direction. Keep on keeping on and thanks for being so inspiring! You look amazing!
    xo Marilyn C.

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  2. All I can say is WOW…and HOORAY….and UNBELIEVEABLE….and YOU ROCK………..AND aren’t those the fantastic Bruin colors on those toes??? O YA!!!
    Hahahahahahahahaha!! Love you Jos! Keep on keepin’ on!!

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  3. Jos you are the Inspiration for us all!
    Love your Blog and keep it coming…it’s been great to read this past year and love your topics, wit and writing! xoxo, jae

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  4. This just made me smile. You have come through adversity with strength and valor. You are an Inspiration to all of us who face adversity. Keep Movin’ and Keep Bloggin’. XO La

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  5. Oh hell Joselyn, the absolute best tribute is to live a lot, drink a little too much, and just f’in forget all that sh** that is in the PAST! You’ve more than paid your dues, you have inspired thousands of us in the deepest way, and now the moment is yours — totally yours. Bask in it, revel in it, goose it, if you’re so inclined. We love you.

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  6. Jos inspired me to reach for the stars on many tough days! Jos creates her own path with the sheer determination to fight on, get healthy & move forward in life! Your blogs are so stylish, so upbeat and so much fun to read – love your positive outlook Jos!

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  7. I love these blogs. You are an amazing woman. Stronger than anyone I know, braver than anyone I know and so loved by all. It was meant to be a USC graduate because our motto will forever be Fight On!
    Lots of Love,
    Robin Razzano Marks

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  8. Jos,

    All those inspirational words are amazing! Thanks for sharing them and your journey with us! I love the ones especially from Mychaela, Rex and Todd. 🙂

    You are truly an inspiration to us and we are praying for you daily…Love you!

    Gretchen and Dick

    Sent from my iPhone

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  9. Joselyn, Great inspiration!!. Glad you are getting out for normal things that we all take for granted but you have a new found appreciation. Careful with the wine might want to switch to tequila.

    Michael Cargile | Senior Vice President
    Voit Real Estate Services
    2020 Main Street, Suite 100 | Irvine, CA 92614
    T (949) 263-5338 | F (949) 261-9092
    mcargile@voitco.com | http://www.voitco.com
    License #00491668

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  10. Jos, I love ya more than my luggage honey!!!! I am SO happy I found you. You have done SO much for my psyche and you help keep me positive. I also have great friends (Erin, you are funny as s*%!) and agree, laughter and positive thinking are as important as any drug. Thanks honey and keep it up!!!
    ps. LOVE your hair!!!

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  11. I only wish I had 1/2 your strength. I have been too silent, but my thoughts and prayers have always been there. You, Joselyn, are a Daughter,” ANYONE would be Proud of”. Blessings to YOU and your amazing Family. I have always known the Transplant would work. I just know. Truly an honor to know you.

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  12. We thank YOU for your inspiration each and every day. It is wonderful to see pictures of you out and about living a ‘normal’ life. Wishing you continued strength, progress, and happiness.

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  13. Seeing that video of Leason in your room while you were getting his magic marrow really got to me. What a miracle!
    XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

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  14. Hi Jos!
    Would love to see you ! Lunch with the girls?… J,M,A,K,K?
    Bday girls Anatasia xoxox btw you look amazingly beautiful! K

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  15. Well Jos, if anyone could take a bushel of lemons and concoct the most deliciously sweet batch of lemonade, YOU could & would! Your ingredients; HOPE, SPIRIT, POWER & PRAYER, w/ a sprinkling of F BOMBS for a tangy twist…Girl! I’ll drink from your fountain any day! Love & laughter being sent your way…

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    1. Dear Angel Maggie and Jon – You have been so inspiring and sweet with your oh-so-kind words and thoughts throughout this entire time! You know just what to say at any given moment! You’ll be the first to try my lemonade 🙂 Love to both of you! XO

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  16. Hi Jos… Here you are! 🙂 What an inspiration you are to everyone in our Universe! Thank you for just being you, for sharing, for inspiring, and for giving your strength to everyone who knows you, and who know you now through your Blog. You are sunshine, rainbows, butterflies, and happy-face clouds floating through Heaven and Earth bouncing off mountains to the ocean spreading hope, spirit, and courage to all. You go girl! You are pure heart and love, and we are blessed to be in your life. You win! We win! Thanks for being YOU and for sharing your journey. Love, Rose ❤

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    1. Rose – You are so inspirational to me! Your words are incredible and have lifted me 🙂 I know you are having a rough time right now, and I wish you all the best of luck coming through it!!! I appreciate all you have done for my spirits! XO

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  17. How could you not persevere with all these inspiring words! It just proves how much you mean to all of us. You have changed our perspectives and have shown us how to endure with strength, grace and humor in the face of such brutal circumstances. You’re simply awesome! Love you xo

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    1. Nettie – YOU are the awesome one! Your support means the world to me, dear friend! When I get the green light, we need to have another Bohemia hug to solidify Crone/Miller GO trip #2, although I’m not sure we could top Cambodia, Thailand and Vietnam!!! XO

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  18. We have follow you closely Joselyn from the beginning and are so happy to see you are not posting often, instead enjoying LIFE! Leason may not have told you, but he has and is helping my wife, Mari’ to come to the states. There is more love between our two families than you know. We will keep up our positive thoughts sent your way.

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