We’ve received some good news 🙂 The pneumonia infection in my lung has gotten smaller, according to a follow-up X-ray. It appears to be fungal, not bacterial, which makes it more difficult to off, but I’m being pumped with endless IV antibiotics and anti-fungals round the clock. I will have a follow up CT scan next Thursday so my docs can take a closer look at what’s crashin’ the healthy lung party. After having nurses bolting into the Bubble in a panic as I “sleep” because my heart rate drops to less than 35 beats per minute, followed by off the charts high blood pressure numbers, all of which was recorded on a heart monitor that I wore for 24 hours, I was super duper nervous for my meeting with Dr. Y (cardiologist). He told me that the abnormal numbers I was posting were likely due to all the medications I’m on, and being that I have no other symptoms, he’s decided NOT to uproot me from the Bubble (yes!) and to basically say sayonara to the heart complication snag (double yes!). So, now we are waiting and hoping on the bad ass horse serum, which will probably take a few weeks to see any positive results on my blood counts, if any. If those results don’t come, we’ll move on to a bone marrow transplant. My heroic brother, Leason, was tested yesterday at COH to see if he is a match for me. Dr. P expects I will be chillin’ in the Bubble for the next 3 weeks, so I can remain in a sterile environment, be close to medical personnel if I react adversely to the ATG Equine Globulin (which can happen 3 weeks after infusion), and to pulverize the bunk in my lung.
…and now for the BIG QUIZ – Use a #2 pencil only and good luck!
Keep in mind that the quizmaster thinks the letter F is neato 🙂
1. Eosinophilic Fasciitis
k) is code for: you’ve got a trig midterm tomorrow and you’re being chased by Guido, the killer pimp.
f) is a disease that BLOWS!
2. Neupogen
f) hurts like a Mo Fo and is not for pussies.
b) is the captivating, brand spankin’ new glittery boy band to dominate the tween scene in Topeka.
3. ATG treatment
f) usually causes the patient to “shake and bake” through horrendous fevers, but with the help of the shiznit docs and nurses at COH, and their special pre-meds, it can be crushed with little discomfort.
h) Ass to Grass ~ a type of squat in weightlifting where one goes as deep as possible.
4. Prednisone
f) is a nasty ass BITCH
r) is a quick, easy, inexpensive and painless alternative to a facelift ~ gives you flawless skin, and a beautiful angled face within the first few doses!
5. The EMG Test measures
a) elephant mating gestures
f) electric activity in the muscles and nerves
6. Some possible side effects of Cyclosporine include:
f) acne, loss of consciousness, vomit that looks like coffee grounds, confusion – I highly recommend it!
y) an uncontrollable urge to play tummy sticks
7. Duarte can be found
n) in the deepest reaches of Fat Bastard’s navel
f) at the base of the San Gabriel Mountains, between Arcadia and Glendora, CA. Musician Glenn Miller once made his home in Duarte. Don’t think he actually MADE his home by engaging in framing, masonry or plumbing, but he lived there.
8. A PICC Line
f) is a fan f-ing tastic toy for all wanting to avoid needles being plunged into their veins multiple times a day.
b) is a high voltage, razor wire barrier that completely surrounds and protects the world’s second largest ball of string from would-be heisters.
9. Platelets
f) are responsible for clotting blood. Quite nifty if you are, say, a knife juggler or like to run with scissors.
d) are like cute little adorable tiny baby plates, some call them saucers and serve like Cheese Whiz and mini marshmallows on them, some even have like unicorns on them!
10. The Bubble
j) is a prelude to a fart ~ the sound of gas traveling through your lower intestine before exiting triumphantly through your ass.
f) is my sterile, negative pressure world for about the next 3 weeks. Rent includes a private vestibule for suiting up in gloves, masks and gowns, a large heard of inspirational miniature horses, a Tom Petty poster, a I heart Joselyn sign from Todd, special photos, silk peonies, 24 hour room service for food and drugs, a view of the San Gabriel Mountains, 4 IV pumps, built-in vital machines, a bathroom, and a bed that can weigh me, measure my heart rate, and notify the nurses when I try to make a break for it.
Sunrise from the Bubble
Answer Key: 1) f, 2) f, 3) f, 4) f, 5) f, 6) f, 7) f, 8) f, 9) f, 10) f
JOSELYN'S BRAWL 
Aren’t WE supposed to be trying to make YOU laugh?!?! You are unbelievable! xoxo
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I’m so embarrassed to admit this, but there have been times when I have wished to live in a bubble. “Oh, sorry, I can’t wipe your ass, Jack. I’m in a bubble.” “Yeah, I actually can’t drum up some fabulous dinner tonight. I’m in a bubble.” “Oh, I can’t spring into combat-ready action at 6:30 am for the 80th day in a row today. I’m in a bubble.” Talk about putting everything in perspective. Your blog has even helped me to be grateful for the times that I’m stuck in traffic!
Also, I’m glad to say I failed your test miserably. For some reason, I wanted all of my answers to involve farts, asses and elephant mating gestures.
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Your attitude and approach to this crappy hand you have been dealt is
inspiring. Love you and miss you.
XO Sharona
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Good news on the lung situation. Tony and I are praying that your fantastic brother is a match.
I missed one on the pop quiz even though you stated that the letter F is neato. The letter J seemed to be the better answer!
Hugs to you,
Linda & Tony Ellis
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Who is a BAMF??
A) girl Scotty
F) joselyn
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Love it 🙂
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You are the best…I think I got all of the answers correct! Is it because F is your favourite letter or that we have too much medical experience ourselves!?!
Cary and I have been hiking the canyons of So Utah for past 2 weeks. Always thinking and praying for you.
We came across a “hairy biker dude” with a Bad Ass T-shirt. He volunteered for a photo which I’m trying to figure out how to send it to you. Sadly, I am technically blog challenged…will send it via email. Keep the faith in your home away from home.
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You continue to amaze dear Jos. Your inner world is off the charts cool and funny.
I love you, Mary Sue
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TMI!
You know too much about this weird medical condition! I’m so sorry you have had to go thru this! The quiz was ingenious but I’m still sad for you!
Glad you had some good news about the lung spot and that Leason was tested. Progress ahead!
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I am so happy to hear that you finally got some good news!!! You deserve it!!! Xoxo
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Amateur medical question: can’t they use MRIs instead of CT scans? If I’m not mistaken CT scans are the equivalent of an f#ing bazzilion X-rays while MRIs don’t have the same negative impacts and do a better imaging job? Ct scans might be ‘cheaper’ but cheaper ain’t better! Just a thought …….I’m not a doctor and I haven’t even played one on tv……
(you know me – I’m field office – we’re always trying to fix things!)
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Jos,
You have me laughing and feeing so deeply all at the same time…YAAFAW
{You are a F…amazing woman}
Love you so much…..xoxo.
Jennifer Miller
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You are a comedian. A very funny woman. We are so sorry you are going through this. Humor is the cure all. Things are going to get better soon. Love to you and Todd.
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You are an inspiration to all of us! Love the humor and spirit. Keep fighting and you will get better. Love to the family.
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Why do I have a ‘nagging’ desire to become a Pokey Pal and sneak into your Bubble? Don’t know quite how, but you have made your experience (or at least part of it) sound fun. You are a brilliant example of “life is what you make it”. Jos,you are a daily inspiration to me. Hope today brings you less fungus, higher heartbeats, less woodpecker, diminished zits and more sleep. Our fam sends white healing light, prayers, and tons of love to you and your fam.
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Dear JOSELYN! You will be so proud of me – i scored 100 on the pop quiz! i hope that my prize will be a nice fresh carrot from your favorite little horsey (Traveler) – and i hope that that little horsey will lead our mighty Trojans to a big victory today! I will hold a pom pom in each hand and shake them mightily – one for you and one for Todd! – I know you will both be there in spirit AND BRING US A HUGE WIN!!! XXXXXOOOOO MOM
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Morning! Just thinking of you! Did you hear about the last Project Runway episode? I know it’s a weird question to ask you but the designer that won was so creative, like u! The assignment was to create a costume for the Rockettes. He designed a shear black long sleeve top with the NY.skyline all sequins on the front and Lady Liberty on the back. Stars were put on the sleaves. Beautiful!
It will be woren by the Rockettes in an actual preformance.
Just a little TV talk!
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….sending sweet, healing thoughts in your direction….Silvia xxoo
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Joselyn…you’re amazing! LOVED the POP QUIZ!! So glad you’re getting some cause for celebrating and I pray they keep coming! Thanks for making your journey so relatable to those of us ‘out here’. Again…you’re such an inspiration! Covering you in prayer my friend….and Ry’s got lots of pull, too! xoxox
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That is such news! You needed and deserved something positive! Love you and now maybe the Trojans can win today! We are praying relentlessly! Xoxo gretchen
Sent from my iPhone
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Yeah…I almost received a 100% but I was thrown off by the choices of question #10. I picked answer (a) the fart…because it made me laugh so effing hard! Your wit and prose is amazing as always. Glad the lung is better, keeping my fingers crossed the horse serum is working and hoping life in the bubble is tolerable. xoxo
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Joselyn-you are amazing! Creative, courageous, really funny & entertaining! I see a new career for you! We are sending love & positive thoughts your way. xoxo
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Thinking about you ALOT! So glad you got some good news. F,B,F,C,A,F.
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since you already have your picc upp line inn – can’t they just suck the damn virus out? jeez girl…you gonna git a gig like diablo cody afta this! FIGHT ON bad ass warrior queen – no doubts – only faith
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When this is over, I see a book in your future. You are amazing.
Cousin Debbie (NewYork)
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Hi Jos, yesterday at a car show I encountered a group called Hats For Hope that is a support group for City of Hope. It was so unusual that they would be at a car show that I knew instantly that it was Karma..so of course I bought one of their hats for you! We will look forward to giving it to you when you are out of the hospital and feeling better, which we are hoping every day will be very soon. SteveSusieSteffi
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. A friend of mine who had cancer was saying how much she misses her oncologist now that her appt are every 3 months. That’s how I felt. That’s what I meant when I said love/hate relationship with the hospital. Hope u r as good. As u can be!!
Julie
Fight On!
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Hi Jos, Duarte is a bit tough to find and a bit wierd too, but the City of Hope camus is impressive – so big they have a shuttle to get you from here to there, but the driver looked like he should be a patient so we passed. I never did well on quizes and this one had some strange voicabulary, but I aced it. Your humor is just amazing in this nasty situation. It’s hard for me to joke about it, but just so you know Carolee and I used to braid the tails of our horses, so if Todd needs some lessons, we are here to help. You are in our thoughts moment to moment.
Lynn and Carolee
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Joscelyn, you fantastical creature you! I hope you have a telly in the bubble. I appreciate you so! Giddy UP! Martha
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Due to cramming (extensive review of your previous blogs) we were able to pass the quiz. Whew….our brains hurt. We loved the platelet question, as we realized that we have many platelets at home in our kitchen, (although none with Unicorns…searching for that one online is our new project) . We have now dubbed you the Duarte Diva. Giddyup! Scott and Robin
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So grateful for these updates. Sending lifelong BFF’s BFF <3, hugs, hope and well wishes, think of you daily. Mwahhhhhhhhhh!
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Hi Jos:
It sounds like things are finally looking up. I am so glad. I hope the next few weeks fly by with no problems.
As for your Cousin, Milly, I’d stay away from her. I don’t think she is a good influence on you. She used to be such a sweet girl, too. I wonder what happened…I guess having kids did it! Oh, she’s still a sweetheart and I loved her note to you. She just always surprises me! Of course, so have you lately with your language, not that you aren’t entitled to it! It must be those steroids. That will do it to you, you know. It changes personalities. I’ve been on them enough to know. Kristin had to get off them before she killed her family! It hit her as she was carrying the knife toward them while they were all watching TV (not really, but close). I never get that bad. I really just get the hair on my face cheeks. (I had to clarify that one). This last time, I almost put it in a lot of mini-braids just to be different. I refuse to shave my face like John has suggested I do! I think he wants me to join the Zoo! I have always felt an attachment to the ape family. Hmmmm.
Hang in there, Jos, and say hello to Todd. We love you.
Love, Aunt Wendy (and Uncle John)
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Hi Jos,
What is grosser than gross? When you dream about eating chocolate pudding and you wake up with a spoon in your ass! I do this all the time. (I normally reserve this type of joke for the Jose trip, but your fart joke made me do it!) Head up soldier!
With Love, Lucas
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You are unbelievable!!! Love and Hugs and Well Well wishes dear friend…
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Bula Jos! just getting internet from being off the grid for several days…after seeing if our kids emailed us…YOU are the one we read right away! think of you everywhere we go here…thankful we live in a country where medicine and great Dr.s are and able to help…as you know, these villages here are lacking so much and medical attention is so poor…happy you are in a California bubble…sounds like the title to a beach boy song…:) xoxo from fiji and me and david
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So incredibly grateful for your blog and to be updated. Check my email often to see how life in the bubble is going. Think of you every day<3 let me know if your daughter family, anyone needs anything! Xoxoxo
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Hi
Bubble girl! How r u today? I just remembered the news story about Bubbles. Think she was a hippo or elephant that escaped from Lion Country Safari to a little pond off Laguna Canyon Road. Remember? I must have been 14 or 15.
A blast from the past!
Be well!
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Hi Jos, I got a 100% on the quiz! It was a bitch though.
Also, I’ve decided that you have been keeping a really big secret from all of us and the world for many years, that you are some type of SUPERWOMAN, with the power to conquer all who dare to do wrong, including biological agents. Who knew?
Your updates and posts are an inspiration, can’t wait for you to vanquish this illness. Even though the views are lovely, hope you are out of the Bubble Room soon and getting good reports from your latest treatments.
Thinking of you daily.
Lynn
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Jos, you are too F-in Funny, not to mention a huge inspiration and true warrior, or should I say Trojan….keep up the good fight, it’s yours to win!!!
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So happy to read some positive news here Jos, I choose to believe this is the start of a roll for you! Think winning streak! Much love and hugs.
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that was a gorgeous san gabriel mountain sunrise, but you kick this f’n things ass so you can get back to the beautiful sunsets of laguna!
In all seriousness, so glad you have had some good news. love you
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Hope you are getting strong and galloping around the bubble! Today I started selling raffle tics to the Laker vs. Oklahoma City game. It’s exciting for me – a sort of challenge. SupportAbility keeps me busy and I feel good about the work it does.
Saw a very exciting suspenseful movie, Premium Rush. About bicycle delivery riders in NY. Very good, gets an A grade! If you have access to movies and it’s offered you would like it!
Take care dear Josh my prayers are always with you.
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The moonlight over Emerald Bay is only half full shinning through the clouds. It is beautiful. May this same light guide you on this journey that you have begun. May it give you a peace but not ever diminish the fire in your soul. You are amazing and I love telling you that!
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Hôpe you r ok they say no news is good news ! I hope so. , I’m a little worried but want u to know you are in my prayers!
Take care!
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Jos,
So happy to hear that there was a good turn this week on the lung. And the Trojans delivered much drama, excitement and a win on Saturday — also good news. Here’s hoping the horses come through, bubble sunsets remain beautiful, lung spot gets out of dodge and you continue to find humor in all this craziness. FIGHT ON!! We’re pulling for you! Tara B
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Your blog is amazing! Love your wit-never knew it existed under the laid back person. Dr H and I think about you often and I hope this fungus kicks out soon.
Dr C
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Dear Jos-we are just picturing the bunk in the lung being pulverized, everything healing within you and THEN you making a break for it!!!!!! We think about you every day. Love love love, Kristi and Doug
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Jos,
Just checked the procedure scoreboard. Surely you are breaking some kind of record. I hate Shulmans and everything that it causes. You are one strong cookie! I’m thinking about you everyday, all day, sending you and Todd love. Remember I’ll sweep the floor of your warehouse. XOXOXO Mary
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Hi Jos,
This might vim in handy. And if you can’t reach Todd could use it!
Love,
Abra,
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Thanks for the answer key, I wasn’t sure on a few. You are hilarious. Praying for you everyday Jos!
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Hi Sweet Joselyn,
Our entire family has been following your blog since you started it. I just found out about this reply option! Thank you for keeping us updated, you are on our minds and in our prayers daily. Hang in there pal. You are a real brawler!! We love you, Jos…xxoo
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That was Vida on the last one signed V 🙂
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Thinking about you and praying that you will recover quickly. XX. Diane
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